TSB loves the Texans and Arian Foster to demolish the Giants this week. They are TSB's BEST BEST for Week 5.

Ok, this is now getting out of control.  After a 6-8 week 4, I’m sitting at 19-27 on the year and 1-2 on Best Bets.  Are there any good teams in the NFL?  Or is every team essentially the same?…..except the Bills.  Well, have no fear Bills fans.  You will get your first victory of the season!  That’s right, you will hold MJD under 250 yds rushing.  That’s a win, right? 

1 PM Eastern

Denver @ Baltimore (-7)

I know, I know.  Kyle Orton is throwing for like 350 yards every week.  But that ain’t happening this week.  Ray Rice and Willis McGahee will have a field day against this defense.  They are both healthy, so look for ball control out of the Ravens and a steady dose of the running game.  PICK: BALTIMORE  RESULT: WIN

Jacksonville @ Buffalo (-1.5)

Easily the worst game of the year. I can’t think of two teams that have looked worse than these two.  Sure, the Jags pulled a rabbit out of their hats last week, but if that game was in Indy, they would have lost by 30.  Now that the Bills finally decided to cut ties with Marshawn Lynch, Fred Jackson and CJ Spiller will be, and have to be, the focal point in this offense.  On the other hand, the Bills run defense is just putrid.  They got smoked for 250yds last week by the Jets, and I don’t see that changing this week.  MJD might eclipse 200 yds today, but since the Jags offensive coordinator has no idea that you are supposed to give the ball to your best player as much as possible, he’ll probably end up with 10 carries for 46 yards.  PICK: JACKSONVILLE…only because I have MJD on my fantasy squad.  RESULT: WIN

Kansas City @ Indianapolis (-7)

Indy can’t stop the run.  NEWS FLASH: INDY CAN’T STOP THE RUN.  Did you hear that KC?  RUN THE DAMN BALL!!!! GIVE IT TO JAMAAL CHARLES!!! KC continues to get disrespected by the Vegas odds makers.  I have no idea why.  Sure, they are going against Peyton Manning this week, but KC has a better run game, defense and special teams.  Indy probably will win this game, but I love the points here.  PICK: KANSAS CITY RESULT: LOSS

St. Louis @ Detroit (-3)

Who would think that a game between two teams that have combined for 7 total wins since 2008, would be a good game?  But I actually do.  Both teams have a suspect defense, and have some high-octane offense.  I normally wouldn’t be betting an Over/Under, but 43 seems way too low.  I’d take the over.  As far as the actual game, QB Shaun Hill has been filling in pretty well for the injured Mat Stafford.  He’s been able to keep the Lions in games, but they just haven’t been able to get over the hump.  The Rams Stephen Jackson seems like he’s over the groin injury that hampered him 2 weeks ago.  The guy is a yardage monster.  Too bad he’s allergic to the endzone.  Sam Bradford has led a decent passing attack in his rook ie season so far.  I like this game to come down to a field goal at the end.  PICK: ST. LOUIS  RESULT: LOSS

Atlanta (-3) @ Cleveland 

Coming of a crazy come from behind win at home against the 49ers, the Falcons take their 3-1 record into Cleveland having to feel good about themselves.  They’ve played good D all season, and have been really running the ball well.  This is going to spell disaster for the Browns.  The play-action pass to Roddy White is gonna come, but the Browns won’t be able to stop it.  It looks as if Jake Delhomme will start for the Browns, and the Falcons defense should be licking its chops.  Atlanta should win this by at least 10.  Lay the wood.  PICK: ATLANTA  RESULT: WIN

Tampa Bay @ Cincinnati (-6.5)

The Bengals have been so Jekyll and Hyde this season.  Somehow in week 2, they beat the Ravens, but last week lost to the Browns.  When the Bengals are running the ball, and not letting Carson Palmer throw it to the other team, they can be pretty good.  Tampa is coming off its by week.  Boy they needed it.  After getting completely dismantled by Charlie Batch and the Steelers, it was back to the drawing board.  There are rumors surfacing out of Tampa that Caddy’s days are numbered, and sucker punch artist, LaGarrette Blount, was taking reps all week with the 1st team in practice.  He was a stud at Oregon, and at 255 lbs, might be the battering ram that needs to jump-start this ground game.  I don’t like Cincy laying any points since they are so inconsistent.  PICK: TAMPA BAY  RESULT: WIN

Chicago @ Carolina (-3)

Last week the Bears O-Line looked like swiss cheese against the Giants and Jay Cutler paid for it.  On the 9th sack of the 1st half, Cutler was knocked out..literally.  Concussion.  So he’s not playing this week, and Todd Collins is.  So we have 2 terrible quarterbacks going here.  Collins and rookie Jimmy Claussen.  So you would think that we’ll get a heavy dose of Jonathan Stewart and DeAngelo Williams for the Panthers.  And for the Bears, 30 touches by Matt Forte.  I give the Bears D the edge here, so I’ll take the points.  PICK: CHICAGO  RESULT: WIN

Green Bay (-2.5) @ Washington

When is this Packers team going wake up?  Everyone was orgasmic about this Packers team in the pre-season, but other than the win against the Bills, they haven’t really been that good.  One of the reasons is that the offense just can’t seem to put a team away.  Last week against the Lions, the offense stalled in the 2nd half, allowing the Lions to get within 2 points.  This Redskins team always seems to play close games.  They are always in the games, and they are generally low scoring.  I wish the spread was a few more points, cause I would have taken the Skins.  But since it’s only 2.5, I’m going with the Packers, and the offense will finally show up.  PICK: PACKERS  RESULT: LOSS

NY Giants @ Houston (-3)

I hope you have plenty of Giants and Texans on your fantasy team, because this could be a monster day for the offenses.  The Texans can’t stop the pass, and the Giants secondary is pretty suspect as well.  Listen, the Giants D won’t have 10 sacks this week, and Matt Schaub is a much better QB than Jay Cutler.  I like Houston to put up 8010 points this week, and -3 is a gift.  I’m taking Arian Foster to the house.  BEST BET PICK: HOUSTON  RESULT: LOSS

4 PM EASTERN

New Orleans (-6.5) @ Arizona

I was thinking about making this my Best Bet of the week, but since I have such pure venom for the Giants, I chose to call them out.  The Cards are a complete mess on offense.  They’re starting an undrafted free agent (No, this is not going to be the 2nd coming of Tony Romo) who is going to have linebackers blitzing all over him like vulture on roadkill in the desert.  I don’t see why the Taints D won’t have at least 2 or 3 turnovers created in this game.  Mr. Brees, it’s time to stop screwing around, and show everyone why you were a 1st round pick in Fantasy Drafts.  Everyone who has picked you is waiting for that 350yd 4 TD game.  This should be it.  PICK: NEW ORLEANS  RESULT: LOSS

San Diego (-6.5) @ Oakland

Which San Diego team is going to show up this week?  On paper, you would think this would be a cakewalk for the Bolts.  But they always have to make it tough on themselves, especially on the road.  Darren McFadden won’t be playing this week due to a hammy injury (shocker there), and Michael Bush will be back getting all the carries this week.  P Riv is still lighting up the fantasy box scores, but still yelling at his WR’s.  I’m just gonna pick the Chargers on talent here.  PICK: SAN DIEGO  RESULT: LOSS

Tennessee @ Dallas (-7)

Personally I think this line is too high.  Tennessee has been playing tight games this season, and have possibly the best RB in the game.  Yes the Dallas defense is good, but you can only stop Chris Johnson so much.  Along with trying to stop CJ2K, the Boys always have a tough time containing QB’s that can run.  and Vince Young is exactly that.  I do like the Cowboys to win this game, but not to cover.  I see a 24-20 type of win, with Romo having another efficient game.  PICK: TENNESSEE  RESULT: WIN

8PM EASTERN

Philadelphia @ San Francisco (-3)

Well, here’s the 4th week in a row where the 49ers are the favorite.  Checking..they are 0-4.  They hype machine is dead.  Now they are fighting to get in the win column.  With offensive standouts like Frank Gore, Michael Crabtree and Vernon Davis, you’d figure that the 49ers would be able to at least put points on the board.  Nope.  Well, luckily for the 49ers, a Michael Vickless Eagles team rolls into town.  Kevin Kolb looked like he was completely lost when he came in in relief for the battered Vick.  I’m going to keep my foot on the throats of the Niners.  LeSean McCoy is going to have a HUGE game.  PICK: PHILADELPHIA  RESULTWIN

MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL 8:30PM

Brett Favre’s Dong @ Jen Sterger’s Cell Phone (-4)

Brett Favre, his dong and his new toy, Randy Moss, head to the Concrete Monolith in the swamp.  Drrrrty Sanchize has been flat-out filthy in his last 3 games.  The kid has 8 TD passes this season and zero turnovers.  Now, if ESPN isn’t the most self loathing entity out there, this will surely put them in the top 3.  Deadspin.com dropped the Favre dong texts to Jen Sterger story about 6 weeks ago.  Now, what a shocker…ESPN is reporting it as “BREAKING NEWS”.  I’m sure it’s just a coincidence that Favre is playing the Jets this week, AND the game is on ESPN Monday Night Football.  BRRRRIIIIGHT!!! Now to the game.  Favre’s ankle is hanging on by a thread+he will be forcing the ball to Moss all game=complete disaster.  LT and Shonn Greene won’t be lighting up the Vikings D to the tune of 250 yds, but they’ll run it enough, to allow TE Dustin Keller to slip through the seams in the play-action game.  I really like the Jets to come out flying and try to kill Brett Favre.  PICK: JEN STERGER’S CELL PHONE  RESULT: WIN

    Comments

  • JACK GEOFF


    pretty funny and i like the picks also.

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