Guys! Hey, guys! The Knicks made a move! No, we didn’t get Eric Bledsoe or Greg Monroe or anyone that can immediately help Melo and the Zen Master bring the Knicks to NBA relevancy this season. It’s nothing that monumental. We did trade for Travis Outlaw and Quincy Acy though. Doesn’t exactly get your juices flowing, huh? No? Not even a teensy eensy bit? 

What did we give up? Jeremy Tyler, Wayne Ellington, and the Knicks decrease the protection on a second round pick of theirs that the Kings already own. This sort of blows because I liked Jeremy Tyler as a prospective big man behind Dalembert on our team. He gave the Knicks a different sort of look and looked decent in the triangle offense during summer league. Alas, the Knicks brass felt we needed forwards so we traded for some mediocre (if we’re being nice) ones in Acy and Outlaw. Am I happy with these additions? Not really if this means they’ll cut into Cleanthony Early’s playing time. (Sigh) It will probably cut into Cleanthony’s playing time.

But let’s talk about Travis Outlaw. He doesn’t do any one thing well as a SF. But he doesn’t do any one thing terribly either! So he’ll be decent as a backup. However, the thing that interests me the most about Outlaw his his hairline. It’s retreating like the Germans at the end of World War II. Here are pictures of other people with similar hairlines:

Meanwhile, Acy is a bruising undersized combo forward. Should be a solid rebounder and defender. But I’m far more interested in his beard.

Look at how glorious that thing is! If James Harden’s beard wasn’t a thing, he’d be in the running for the best beard in the NBA for sure. Do you guys remember Freeway? From the Roc? Sort of reminds me of his beard! Let’s take a gander.

freeways-beard-is-like-marry-poppins-purse.8.jpg

So in terms of having players on your team with awesome facial, the Knicks really look like they made out with this trade. Also, if the Knicks wanted to acquire someone with Lebron’s hairline because they couldn’t add Lebron during the offseason, this also works. However, if we are talking about valuable contributions on the basketball court, it remains to be seen if this gets the Knickerbockers any closer to being a contender.

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