Standing 7’1″ and weighing 209 lbs, Latvian power forward Kristaps Porzingis is rocketing up draftboards for some ungodly reason. Hailed as a “stretch 4″ with “great length”, the latest draft rumors have Porzingis going as high as 2nd overall to the LA Lakers and no lower than 5th overall to the Orlando Magic. With his game resembling a younger, shittier version of Andrea Bargnani, Kristaps Porzingis apparently has a decent shot but struggles to grab more than 4 rebounds per game in the Liga ACB overseas. If the New York Knicks pull the trigger on Darko Milicic 2.0 with the 4th overall pick, I am going to stop watching them for good.
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The Knicks got fucked royally in the NBA Draft this season. After tanking like no team has tanked before, they had the 2nd best chance at the #1 overall pick only to have their logo pop up in the 4th slot. Minnesota, the worst team in the NBA this season, is sitting pretty at #1, while the Lakers and 76ers round out the top 3. I’d be a liar if I said I don’t condone tanking. The NBA draft process makes tanking the best way to get a better team the following season. I wanted the Knicks to go 0-82 so they’d be able to get a decent player, a cornerstone upon which a franchise worth rooting for could be built. Instead, New York won a couple of late season games, and here we are. I was hoping the Knicks could land Batman in the 2015 NBA draft. Kristaps Porzingis is NOT the savior Gotham so desperately needs. If anything, he’s a shitty version of Bane that causes absolutely no chaos whatsoever. Just look at him:
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Look at this shitty version of Bane that no one is afraid of
The Bargnani experiment in New York failed miserably. Developing a younger, weaker (is that even possible?) version of him will take time that Carmelo Anthony’s knees do not have. The Knicks need pieces to the puzzle right now if they’re going to compete in an epically weak Eastern Conference (seriously, the Atlanta Hawks had the best record last season. The Washington Wizards were a legitimate threat to get to the NBA Finals until John Wall got injured. The time to succeed in the East is right fucking now). If Jahlil Okafor somehow drops to 4th overall, the Knicks have to take him. I’m not high on Emmanuel Mudiay, but he will at least contribute right away. I want New York to take Justise Winslow (Jimmy Butler version 2.o), but it’s not gonna happen. Shit, even Willie Cauley-Stein is acceptable. But please, please not Porzingis. Knicks basketball will become more unwatchable than last year (again, is that even possible?).
