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NBAOther Sports

What Cereal Do the Boston Celtics’ Wives Taste Like?

TotalSportsBlog 10 years ago 5 Min Read
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Carmelo flipped his lid. Can you blame him? This lowlife by the name of Kevin Garnett said that his precious LaLa tasted like Honey Nut Cheerios! As if! How would this punk know how this queen tastes? Balderdash, I say! He was merely trying to get under Carmelo’s skin. While Melo is taking the high road (LOL J/K, he waited for KG by the Celtics’ team bus to have a word or two with him.), we at TSB don’t roll like that. Well, I can’t speak for everyone. I’m the one taking the low road here. I don’t mind getting my hands dirty. Don’t worry, Melo. I got you.

Everyone meet Rajon Rondo’s wife. I know, I know. Rajon Rondo had nothing to do with this. But he’s an a-hole and he kills the Knicks. Look at his wife though. I’d put a bag over her head if it didn’t look like a box would fit it better. I’ve never seen someone’s face have acute right angles before. I just want to make sure y’all read that as “acute right angles” and not “a cute right angles”. I know what you’re thinking, people. “But what kind of cereal does she taste like, Baggydizz?” Verdict: Frankenberry.

The resemblance is uncanny. I’m not going to front, she also looks like the dad from the TV show “Dinosaurs” albeit she might need some plaid to finish off the look. If you need a refresher:

Okay, I’ll admit that she has better skin. On to the next one.

This is Paul Pierce’s wife. I have nothing against her. She is pretty and seems like a fine and upstanding member of society…other than the fact that she’s married to Paul Pierce….one of the douchiest douches to ever live. The guy thinks he’s a Knicks killer. He walks around MSG shot after shot, talking major trash, and making choking hand gestures. Pfft. He’s no Reggie, Michael, or Kobe. We’re talking about a guy who made like his leg was shot during game 1 of the 2008 NBA Finals and then came back ten minutes later like nothing happened. Verdict: Chex

Why? Well, only because this chick needs to check herself for being with a poser like Paul Pierce. Sure, he may have a lot of money but money isn’t going to stop the douchiness from rubbing off on you. She may be the biggest douchette on the face of this planet now.

Jason Terry’s wife looks like the missing member from the long, lost R&B group “Total”. He also once said that his wife was better looking than Beyonce. Verdict: This chick tastes like two cereals. Total and Batman.

Why? “Total” makes sense. I picked “Batman” as well because The Jet is bat-sh$# crazy for thinking his wife looks better than Beyonce. What the hell is she putting in your cereal? LSD?

Pffffffffft, KG’s wife is bad as hell. I know nothing about her too. Verdict?

That’s what you get for being with a corny ass fugazi. KG, how do you like eating Corn Flakes all night? Bitch. I’ll take Honey Nut Cheerios all day over Corn Flakes, mark ass trick. Yeah, you heard me. Come at me, bro. Don’t think that I forgot about Anthony Peeler.

I also didn’t forget Lamarcus Aldridge snuffing you either. 

I see you, KG. You’re a punk.

I got you, Melo. You don’t need to get yourself suspended anymore by waiting for punks at their team buses. Just holler at your boy. I got your back

TotalSportsBlog January 10, 2013
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