This morning Aaron Hernandez found out there would be no high speed chase involving the police and a white bronco as he was arrested and formally charged with murder, not to mention the Patriots cut him from their roster. In addition to murder he was also charged with several counts of unlawful possession of firearms, so even if the murder charge doesn’t stick they’re going to get him on something. Hernandez joins a growing list of NFL players who have either killed someone or have been alleged to kill someone.
The most famous of course is Ray Lewis who seemingly got away with murder and actually became a more famous player because of it. Another notable NFL murderer is Donte Stallworth who was actually proven guilty of manslaughter but he was drunk so he only got thirty days. Neither of these guys spent any significant time in jail and were able to continue their careers. On the other hand Plaxico Burress who was only guilty of being stupid and shooting himself in the leg was sentenced to two years in prison and Pacman Jones was suspended from the NFL for two seasons for hanging out with guys who were shooting people. It seems the NFL policy is “If you kill someone, shit happens but don’t hang out with the wrong crowd and don’t you dare shoot yourself or we’ll ruin you!” It will be very interesting to see what happens to Hernandez who is only twenty-three years old. My prediction is that if he’s convicted of murder he’ll be out in time for training camp but if he’s convicted of unlawful possession of firearms he will spend several years in prison. Either way I’m sure Tom Brady will send him a new pair of Uggs to cheer him up while he’s in the can.
My feet are so warm!
Speaking of terrible people, the Miami Heat won their second straight NBA title this week. This of course brings much sadness to a large portion of Americans who have come to loathe the team. This is the problem with the NBA: You spend most of your time hating one team, that you almost forget to root for your own team. LeBron James and the Heat are starting to enter the Jordan/Bulls department in terms of dominating the league. The big difference between LeBron and Michael though is that you hated Jordan but you still respected him. There is no respecting LeBron James in my opinion. Whatever respect previously existed has been washed away in a sea of flops and repeated showings of “The Decision”. Regardless, congratulations to the twenty seven Miami Heat fans who live in Miami and the other several hundred who are scattered all across the country.
Don’t look too excited.
Finally in the NHL, John Tortorella was fired by the New York Rangers following a second round playoff exit at the hands of the Boston Bruins. I was surprised by the firing since he has had a successful tenure with the team but I guess when you’re that much of a prick to the local media you better at least be reaching the Stanley Cup Finals every year or shut up. So Tortorella takes his talents to Vancouver where he’ll fit right in since he, like the citizens there, also enjoys flipping over cars and setting them on fire after a bad loss. The Rangers replace him with Alain Vigneault who was previously the coach of the Canucks. (Coach swap!) Vigneault seems more low energy and less maintenance than Tortorella, but I guess that was the point. Like Tortorella, Vigneault was fired after a poor playoff showing. He has a Stanley Cup finals appearance and a President’s Trophy under his belt. While perhaps a coaching change was needed I think ultimately the front office must change in order for the Rangers to succeed. Glen Sather has been the general manager of this team for far too long and has very little to show for it.
John Tortorella’s introductory press conference in Vancouver.
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