DX Crotch chup

If you are a male in your early thirties, it is almost a guarantee that at one time or another you were a huge WWE/WWF fan. It was in our blood. On Saturday mornings you were fixed to the television, just hoping to see your favorite wrestler. The commercial would end and then…”OH MY GOSH!!! IT’S HIS MUSIC!!!” would pulsate through your tiny little skull. For me, that was either The Ultimate Warrior or Bret Hart. Those theme songs just got me so pumped.

The most famous theme song is obviously Hulk Hogan’s “I Am A Real American”, but the only time you ever heard it was during the big Pay Per View events. But even back in 1987, my parents weren’t dropping thirty bucks on a wrestling event. So I rarely heard it. But I’m glad I didn’t. Hogan was already the face of the WWF and I wanted someone of my own to root for.

I was a hardcore WWF fan from about 1987-1995, then got back into it again during the Attitude Era. As I got older, the more mature/risqué story lines appealed to me. Stone Cold Steve Austin and The Rock were staples on Monday Night Raw, along with D-Generation X. “Let’s Get Ready To SUUUUUUUCCCKKKK IT!!!” was a popular tagline thrown around the locker room in high school, and I ate it up. Crotch chops were given out on the reg. But that’s basically when I stopped watching. Don’t ask me about Jon Cena, “The Shield”, CM Punk, Daniel Bryan, or Sheamus. Because I don’t know anything about them. I actually just went to the WWE website to see the names of some of the wrestlers.

So here are my Top 10 wrestling theme songs from when I watched. Love it or hate it, leave it on the box below.

10. Big Boss Man

Aviator sunglasses. Check. Billy Club. Check. Talking an inordinate about of shit to the fans as he walking down the ramp. Check. Big Boss Man never really made it to the top (he was tag team champion once), but his theme song was bad ass.

9. Legion Of Doom

The guttural “OOOOOOOOUUUGGGGGHHHHHH WHAT A RUSH!!” sent the crowd in a frenzy every time it played. During a few WWF events I went to back in the day, Legion of Doom happened to be wrestling that night and the place nearly erupted.

8. The Rock

There have been a few variations of The Rock’s theme song over the years. It’s either started with “If you smell. What the Rock. Is Cookin.” or “Can You Smell. What The Rock. Is Cookin?”. Either one works for me. The Rock’s skills on the mic turned a once drab theme song, into one of the best of all time.

7. New Age Outlaws (Road Dogg Jesse James and Bad Ass Billy Gunn)

At the forefront of the WWE “Attitude Era”, the New Age Outlaws were the tag team dynamo of D-Generation X that helped the WWE become must see TV.

6. Million Dollar Man

Oh that menacing laugh. “Everybody’s got a price. Everybody’s gotta pay. ‘Cause the Million Dollar Man…Always gets his way! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!. Some might cost a little, some might cost a lot. But I’m the Million Dollar Man. And you will be bought. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH HAHAHAHAHAHA”. Pure genius.

5. Chris Jericho – Y2J Attitude Era

The countdown clock was a fantastic gimmick at the beginning. The arena was always in this state of confusion/excitement when the song came on the Titantron.

4. Bret Hart

That opening guitar riff would almost make your ears bleed. Combine it with the funky bass line, this made for one of the best there is, the best there was, and the BEST there ever will be…

3. Stone Cold Steve Austin

Shattering glass and then out from behind the curtain like a bat outta hell. That was Austin at his best. Coming down that ramp and yelling profanity at anyone and everything in his path. Stone Cold’s theme song was one of pure chaos and a bass line that thumped as if it was a snake setting up to strike from the tall grass.

2. D-Generation X

The total package when it came to the greatest entrances of all time. The song and video on the Titantron was the pinnacle of the Attitude Era and a song that is still holds up to this day.

1. Ultimate Warrior

When I was ranking the top four songs, I had to incorporate everything. The song itself, how it holds up over time, the wrestler’s entrance to the song, and if I used when wrestling with my friends when I was a kid. That’s why this is my number one. It the song itself is real solid, it holds up, but most importantly, the way that Warrior came out to that song was a sight to be seen. The dude brought the same intensity every single time. This guy came down the ramp like Carl Lewis after eating a kilo of cocaine. But it didn’t stop there. The rattling of the ring ropes as the music blared was maybe my favorite part. The Ultimate Warrior’s intensity was unmatched.