Children grow up with a lot of trauma nowadays. I mean, we do live in an age where “Keeping up with the Kardashians” and “Teen Mom” are both hit shows. The sad thing is that both of those shows are about exactly what I’m talking about. The 7th episode of the 4th season of Game of Thrones deals with the trauma that many of the characters on the show have faced as children or about to and how they are dealing. Except for Brienne and Pod. They’re still looking for those dang Stark kids.
We learn about The Hound’s childhood scarring from the man himself. We’ve heard the story before from Petyr Baelish but hearing the Hound tell it to Arya is a little bit more gut wrenching. Considering the fact that his own brother did it and his father covered it up is enough to give a guy some issues. However, he seems like he’s grown up to be a better man than either of them with the way he provided mercy to the stabbed man at the beginning of the episode. We also know that Arya has been through a lot of emo stuff too. I mean, she witnessed her pops get beheaded. Heavy shit.
Speaking of Starks, Sansa had the best seat in the house in watching her dad getting his head chopped off. She also has to deal with the guy who was in love with his mom making moves on her too. C’mon, Baelish. Have some self respect! Sansa also had to deal with her crazy Aunt Lysa wanting to kill her because she’s in love with Littlefinger but Littlefinger is kind of a pedo for Sansa. No bid deal because Littlefinger tosses Lysa through the moon door. Sansa can’t even catch a break.
While we’re on the Starks, let’s talk about Jon Snow at the Wall! To the windooooooooooow, to the wall! Anyways, no one really ever cared what Jon Snow had to say because he was a bastard…except for his family. And that pudgy guy with the molestor mustache that’s always at his side. So when he mentions sealing off the tunnel for the wall, what do you think happens? He gets disregarded, of course!
You know who else probably has a messed childhood? Stannis Baratheon’s daughter. She lives in a dungeony room and half of her face is covered in scales. She’s like a Care Bear version of a Spiderman villain. Apparently, the Baratheons and Melisandre are going on a trip but mommy wants to leave the kid at home. Melisandre’s not hearing it though because the Lord of the Light has plans for her. Honestly, I don’t care. We just got a whole scene of Melisandre walking around naked and for some weird reason, I have a thing for her so this is a good thing. You can make fun of me on twitter but I will defend myself.
Oh, and last but not least, how about Tyrion Lannister? The dwarf child that his father and sister despises because his mom died during his birth! We go through three scenes of no one giving a shit about the poor guy. Jamie is one of the rare people on Westeros that cares about him but he can’t be his champion because….well….he can’t give him a hand. I was waiting years for the perfect moment to drop that one. YEARS. Bronn comes by and informs that he’s going to be married to the youngest sister of some well off family and he jokingly plans to kill the older sister. But because he has so much to gain from that situation, he can’t be Tyrion’s champion for the second time. He’s legitimately sad faced but he actually has something to lose now. So in comes Prince Oberyn, the Red Viper. He decides to tell the story of the he first met Tyrion and how the whole kingdom had stories of how he was a monster but Oberyn and his family never saw him that way. However, it seems like Cersei’s champion, Ser Gregor, also was one of the people behind killing and raping of Oberyn’s sister so it looks like he will be Tyrion’s champion.
Ummmmm, have you seen how humongous Ser Gregor is, bro?
Observations, tweets, tumblrs, etc.
– No, I did not forget that Danny Tagaryen was doing her damn thing during this episode. First, she revealed herself to having the strongest pimp hand on the show by having relations with Daario:
Meh, she’s had better.
And then this happened:
You can feel the energy being sapped out of his body
– Sansa didn’t have it all bad since she got to smack up Robin Arryn for messing up her snowcastles. Frankly, I don’t blame her. They looked like she put some time and effort into them.
EFF YOUR MOONDOOR! YOU DON’T KNOW ME!
– We need more Littlefinger gifs:
– Check out Arrya poking someone’s heart out (THIS IS NOT FACEBOOK, YO)
– Ser Gregor is looks really thuggish ruggish:
– GAME OF THRONES FASHION POLICE, Y’ALL
– What were your thoughts on yesterday’s episode? Do you think Prince Oberyn is secretly a ninja?